ECSTASY, AGONY, AND ECSTASY!


NOTE: This week’s contributing writer is long time ATAGer and host of the annual ATAG Steak Night Scotty Greene. He offers his insights on both the match and the drama that unfolded later in the evening.

“Golf is a cruel sport.”  author unknown

“What a stupid I am…”      Roberto De Vicenzo

Ecstasy, Agony, and Ecstasy: 4-26-2016: By Scotty Greene                                                    

From a detached, analytical distance the Ansley Tuesday Afternoon Golf (ATAG) group would not appear to present a writer much, if any, extraordinary material to work with. ATAG is a collection of mostly mid to high handicappers…all men, mostly all aged north of 60 (with the handful of under 50 and even under 30 year old players who probably tell their friends that they do volunteer work with sr. citizens on Tuesday evening) who gather weekly on Tuesday evenings to play casually competitive half rounds of golf for the largely symbolic stakes of a beer and a dollar.

But the writer assigned this piece is not detached, analytical, or writing from distant perspective. This writer is a participant, a player….who, after years of playing ATAG, knows firsthand the drama, the emotions, the agony and the ecstasy that always lurk beneath the apparent calm surface of this weekly afternoon golf outing. And the ATAG round on Tuesday April 26, 2016 could possibly go down as the record breaking example of all of these things coming together at the same time both on and off the course.

But I digress. First, let’s get the facts straight: Danny Morris, Brooks Cowles, Scotty Greene, and (visitor) Tom Lewis made up the Winning Team roster firing a team 10 under to collect the golden ale from the losers (DAL for Dead Ass Last) Jeff Kohn, Tim Martin, Doug Gooding, and (newcomer, under 50 years old!!) Scott Vandermeer with a team score of 7 under. (more on this later, in the drama section).

Twenty Two Handicapper Tom Houle won Low Net honors shooting a 43(!) for net -4, 32! His round included a jaw dropping, awe inspiring real Eagle 2, net zero on the not easy par 4, no. 4 hole. There may have been ATAG eagles before…but it is doubtful that there have been any like this: by a 22 handicapper, after a perfect drive, a perfectly struck 9 iron from 125 yards out that found the bottom of the cup on one bounce. ECSTASY! Team mate Jeff Colbath’s 4 net 3 gave their team a stunning 5 shot (surely record setting) pick up. Dramatic indeed. But we are just getting started.

Ron Majors won Low Gross…a-gain…(yawn) shooting a decidedly meh (for him) round of 40, losing 4 shots to par in the last three holes.

The Pink Lady winner for highest net went to ATAG journeyman Doug Healy for his net 9 over par. His 16 handicap wasn’t enough to save him from a personal worst 53 gross (a whopping 17 different swing thoughts over par in one round)

Back to the drama. Those who saw Tom Houle come off the no.9 or come up the steps and take his seat knew something was up. There was the spring in his gait, his grin, the sparkle in his eyes that told veteran mid/high handicappers that one of their own must have had a better than usual round of golf. Turns out we didn’t know the half of it! The 43 answer to the usual post round Q&A …”whadyashoot?”. did not dent the grin or the sparkle. Ok great, 43 and…? 9 IRON, HOLE OUT EAGLE ON NO.4! Houle’s teammates were talking all at once: “Didn’t see it go in…walked around looking for it…found it in the hole!” Now Houle’s grin was a big smile, the eyes really lit up as he gave the ATAG version of post round “what was going through my mind” account of a great golf shot( “I nutted it”), with an incredible result…an Eagle, net zero and final 43. Ecstasy.

Agony (ok, disappointment) Surely a 22 handicapper who eagles a par 4 hole with two pops and who keeps his s—t together to card a final 43 net 32 will win something…. Winning Team, Low Net….something. But no. At least for that moment in time, Houle’s eagle and teammate Colbath’s birdie on 9 meant only that they were not DAL and didn’t have to buy. Brooks Cowles, 21 handicapper, thinking he had shot 42, net 31 got the dough, the photo, and the applause for Low Net winner.

In echoes of the 1968 Masters (when Roberto DeVicenzo left the course thinking he had shot his way into a play-off with Bob Goalby),  Cowles, Houle, and the ATAG golfing world, would discover that a scorecard error undid that result. Like DeVicenzo, Cowles did not check his card closely before it went to the Commissioner. Cowles would have seen that the 42 on the card omitted his 5 on no. 9 for total of 47. Houle really did shoot a 43, but gracefully accepted the fact that his score, with its net zero Eagle, was not enough to claim Low Net honors and the money.

Ecstasy. Overnight the Commish, when reviewing the scorecards of each team, spotted the error on Cowles team card, informed all involved, and gave Tom Houle the delayed pleasure of winning Low Net. The error did not change the winning team results. The email exchanges between the Commish, Cowles, Houle and Morris (Cowles teams’ scorekeeper) showed the ATAG hallmarks of grace and sportsmanship.

Afterthoughts (and a little more drama). For the first time in this writer’s memory there was a four way tie for DAL, with four teams locked at seven under, necessitating the tie breaker card comparison system.

Colbath birdied No. 9 to win the card playoff to save his temporarily benighted team from buying and to keep the Birdie Train rolling.

Shot of the Day: See above. Weather: Nice. Trends: High handicappers winning low net.

COMMISSIONER’S COMMENTS:

The Commissioner thanks Mr. Greene for his insightful and eloquent chronicle of this Tuesday’s match and its aftermath. Three people were culpable for the error that resulted in Tom Houle being denied his official low net recognition and photo presentation of the coveted twenty one dollar bills–scorekeeper Danny Morris whose addition error reported a score of 42 on the card, Brooks Cowles, who should have known there was no way he could have shot a 42 (see his apologetic comments below), and the Commissioner himself who should have checked the math on the low net claimant’s score after receiving the card on the porch. (something he will most definitely do from now on). Fortunately, the error was caught in time to enable it to be rectified and published accordingly and appropriate apologies were issued.

Brooks Cowles:  “again, my responsibility to check card.  I was thinking during the round that Scotty might have it after he drained putt after putt, so I was surprised when my gross was reported.  I don’t think I have ever shot 42 in my life.  But with each pat on the back, my ‘Sally Fields Oscar moment’ (you like me!) deepened.  And when I got my hands on that fat wad of bills, I was done.  Now I have to figure out how to get 42 out of the handicap system where I proudly entered it! Tom, you can get your money at Tattletales. Cheyenne has most of it but Amber and Jade have some too.”

That’s it for this week’ recap. Check out the photos in the Gallery and scroll down for the individual scores from today’s match. And, good luck to those ATAGers playing in this weekend’s Member-Member Tournament! As ATAG Standard Bearers, we trust that we will see one or more of your names in the final standings on the Leaderboard.

Final Results: 4-26-2016    Front Nine      Gross/Net

Majors                                                40/35

Greene                                                  42/34

Martin                                                   42/35

Vandermeer                                          42/35

Houle                                                    43/32

Kohn                                                        44/38

Morris                                                     45/37

Wymer                                                     46/34

McGlynn                                                  46/36

Williamson                                              46/37

Gooding                                                    46/39

Kisgen                                                       47/34

Cowles                                                       47/35

Nichols                                                       47/36

Lewis                                                          47/37

Colbath                                                       48/37

Murphy                                                       49/42

Corrigan                                                      52/40

Healy                                                          53/45

Jobson                                                         54/43

 

 

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A PERFECT DAY FOR GOLF AND A VERY FAST TRACK!


NOTE: This week’s volunteer contributing writer is long time ATAGer Tom Kisgen, a professional engineer by trade but better known to all of us as the ATAG Humorist.

April 19, 2016 ATAG Reporter: Tom Kisgen

A full field of golfers showed up for this week’s match on Ansley’s onerous back nine, playing considerably shorter these days thanks to the dry Spring weather and the short zoysia grass which is just starting to wake-up from a long winter’s nap.   Twenty lucky ATAGers were rewarded by Mother Nature with beautiful mild weather and a gentle breeze on this day

Commish’s team does it again!

Well, that’s not actually true, but the Commish’s pre-match pick as this week’s favorites nearly pulled it off. John Wymer, Mike Gaddis, Tom Houle and David Danzig won the match in a tie-breaker over the Commish’s odds on favorites– Ron Majors, Brooks Cowles, Tim Martin and Frank Corrigan. This week’s winning score was a not so impressive 8 under, considering the ideal scoring conditions. Sponsoring the free drinks for the winners were the DAL team of William Thornton, Jeff Colbath, Pat Murphy and Mike Schmal with a score of 2 under. And with the other two teams turning in scores of 3 under and 4 under, this was a day of mediocre play with perhaps 1 or 2 exceptions. But, congrats to the winners! And better luck next time to all the rest of us.

LOW NET WINNER: Frank Corrigan, firing a blistering 43, for a net 31, was unchallenged as this week’s low net champ! Frank advised that his card featured 4 pars, 1 birdie (more on that in a minute) and 4 “others” in his round, which nearly won low gross honors.   Frank took home this week’s purse of twenty bucks.

LOW GROSS WINNER: Narrowly squeaking by Frank’s 43 gross was this week’s low gross winner Ron Majors with a score of 42. Ron confessed that the best thing about his round was showing up on the first tee and witnessing Frank’s great play.

PINK LADY WINNER: In a rout, Kevin McGlynn posted a net 10 over to walk away with the pink lady award this week.

SHOT OF THE DAY: Numerous candidates for shot of the day included Scotty Greene’s skulled hybrid approach to hole number 17, which bounced off the wall of clear creek and scooted up onto the green for an improbable par, and John Wymer’s remarkable pars on holes 15 (sunk a 75 foot par putt) and a pitch from somewhere near the tennis courts to 3 feet from the pin on number 18 green to save par. But, the clear cut shot of the day belongs to Frank Corrigan, whose tee shot on 18 was stiff to the pin for a tap in birdie!   Way to go, Frank!

BIRDIE CLUB: The Birdie Train kept rolling thanks to the individual efforts of Frank Corrigan and Jeff Colbath, each of whom birdied # 18, the latter making his first ATAG appearance of the year.

SEEN ON THE COURSE: Debra, our lovely former drink cart lady, back in town for a short visit, graced us with her presence at the first tee, where she gave out those warm soft Debra hugs to several of her favorite ATAGers.  The Commish’s team was apparently awarded a mulligan on those hugs over at the 12th tee. (see Gallery) And not seen on the course this week thankfully, was that loud and obnoxious helicopter moving up and down along the Beltline right of way, and disturbing our peace. Good riddance.

19TH HOLE CHATTER: A perfect day for golf turned into a perfect evening for lingering on the upper porch, enjoying good company, good wings (more on that in a minute) and the pleasant weather. Danny Morris notched a cameo appearance after he came by to catch the recap of the stories of our golfing exploits. Double D (aka David Danzig)  was chastised for his blistering commentary on the quality of the free wings the previous week, along the lines of not looking a gift horse in the mouth. Someone coming to his defense commented about the undersized and overcooked “quail wings” they served last week. Scotty Greene’s name came up in reference to his late arrival to the match, causing him to miss his tee time, a no no and who was also noticed to leave early (another no no).  A couple of us (names intentionally omitted) commented about the sheer luck of not hitting any cars with our blocked and sliced drives off number 10 tee to start the round.

All in all, another great day for golf and the continuing saga of ATAG.

COMMISSIONER’S COMMENTS:

Thanks to Mr. Kisgen for his concise recap. It was a truly beautiful and warm afternoon that saw another full field of 20 ATAGers, and I was glad that the Commissioner’s Team dodged the curse by barely escaping the dungeon thanks to a woeful performance by another pairing. And, congrats to “Lucky Frank” Corrigan, who has a garage full of pink golf balls, for his best ever round of 43 for a net 5 under to win his first ever low net booty. Corrigan claims he had won it before, but a review of the stats from 2006 through 2015, could not substantiate such a claim.

That’s it for this week’s recap. Check out the photos in the Gallery and scroll down for the individual scores from today’s match.

4-19-2016   Final Results    Back Nine   Gross/Net

Majors                                                      42/38

Corrigan                                             43/31

Martin                                                      43/37

Gaddis                                                       44/38

Murphy                                                      45/38

Nichols                                                       46/35

Thornton                                                    46/40

Schmal                                                         46/41

Wymer                                                         48/36

Danzig                                                           48/36

Greene                                                         48/41

Kisgen                                                           49/37

Colbath                                                          49/39

Williamson                                                    49/41

Jobson                                                             50/39

Healy                                                                50/42

Sellner                                                              51/39

Cowles                                                               51/41

Houle                                                                 53/42

McGlynn                                                            56/46

 

 

 

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EPIC LIFT/CLEAN/PLACE POST-MASTERS ATAG!


Note: This week’s contributing writer is long time ATAGer and renown Atlanta food critic David Danzig who offers his commentary below:

April 12, 2016-By David Danzig

A palpable buzz could be felt on the warm breeze beneath the azure sky prior to the commencement of 4/12 Front-9 ATAG proceedings. The buzz emanated partially from the recently concluded Masters Tournament where Jordan Spieth’s 7 on the par 3 #12 gave all of us golfing mortals comfort in our own futility. The other buzz came from a low-flying helicopter (see gallery for photos) that was surveying the encroachment of Flagler Ave residents into the Beltline’s property.

12 Under takes the Golden Ale!

Upon walking up to the #1 green and the right greenside bunker, I picked up a 58 degree wedge that Bill Meagher had left. Was it a message? An omen? A low-handicapper acting like a careless high-handicapper?   Apparently all of the above. Not only did Meagher not need the wedge for 6 more holes (I guess when you hit greens in regulation you don’t need one) but his 39 earned him the (unprofitable) distinction of low gross and his comrades of Henry Sawyer, William Thornton and Kevin McGlynn ham-and-egged their way to an impressive 12 under par amidst wet and breezy conditions. The team happily drank their free beverages under the setting amber hues on the ATAG Skydeck sponsored by the losing team of Tom Houle, Steve Bates, Brooks Cowles and Bill Buist who lost in an agonizing score card playoff to the team of David Danzig, Tom Player, Doug Gooding and Pat Murphy where the #1 handicap hole (#6) witnessed Player and Danzig using their “2 pops” to chalk up a 5-net-3 birdies and save their brothers the ultimate indignity by one stroke.

3-way chip-off with Oosthuizen-esque Finish Crowns Danny Morris Low Net Champion!

At the end of the round, 3 warriors stood alone at net 34: Morris, Sawyer and Martin. Down to #9 they went where some nutjob decided that the Drop Zone rest behind the left greenside bunker creating an impossible shot with the pin placement. Sawyer knocked a respectable effort onto the green—still 25 feet from the hole. Martin followed with an almost-great effort that stalled on the apron of the green and then Morris got up, flopped what surely would have rolled farthest away from the hole until it collided, Louis Oosthuizen-style, with Sawyer’s ball and ricocheted into the winning position and secured him the $20 purse.

Pat Murphy’s (Not So) Triumphant ATAG Return

ATAG Alum and 14 handicapper Pat Murphy, who last played on the ATAG tour in 2011 (rumor has it he had been playing in the Asian ATAG Tour, affectionately known as the MATAG Tour because the international date line sets their matches on Mondays), returned to ATAG with a disappointing 43 net, edging out Doug Gooding and Steve Bates for the pinkster honors. Speaking of ATAG alum, former ATAG regular Richard Batelaan will officially be moving back to Atlanta this summer. Hopefully we will see RB back on the Tuesday night links.

Danzig Reviews ATAG Cuisine

Tuesday’s fare was a mixed bag of ups and downs at the men’s grill buffet station. On the positive side, large, soft and salty pretzels made their ATAG debut to rave reviews from the hungry players. Warm to the touch and soft to the palate, these fresh-baked, fist-sized beauties dipped splendidly into the slightly spicy cheese sauce and accompanied ice cold beer in spectacular fashion. On the downside, the chicken wings have now seemed to have reached a painful nadir; they were dry, flavorless and looked to have been harvested from a flock of Zika-stricken birds who had free ranged in a septic field on this night. Perhaps it’s time to phone the club’s Sysco rep and dial up a new offering.

COMMISSIONER’S COMMENTS:

I was unable to attend this week’s outing, but I did enjoy the play by play offered by Mr. Danzig and interesting to note that former ATAGers Pat Murphy and Richard Batelaan are now hoping to rejoin the Tour. (Good luck–it’s a hard line up to crack)  Also, it  should have been noted that Lee Pearson and William Thornton made contributions to the Birdie Club to keep that train rolling.

Hard to believe that the usually popular chicken wings have now become something akin to what Mr. Danzig describes as a “flock of Zika-stricken birds who had free ranged in a septic field”. Perhaps Mr. Danzig, who is used to sampling finer cuisine, exaggerated somewhat because I always find the little critters quite tasty and priced right.

That’s it for this week’s recap. Check out the photos in the Gallery and scroll down for the individual scores from this week’s match.

4-12-16   Front Nine     Gross/Net

Meagher                                           39/36

Pearson                                             40/35

Martin                                                41/34

Morris                                                 42/34

Thornton                                            43/37

Schmal                                                43/38

Williamson                                         44/36

Sawyer                                                  45/34

Danzig                                                  45/35

Gaddis                                                  45/39

Bates                                                      46/42

Sellner                                                    48/36

Cowles                                                    48/37

Houle                                                      49/38

Gooding                                                   50/42

Murphy                                                    50/43

Buist                                                          51/39

Player                                                        51/41

McGlynn                                                  51/41

 

 

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ATAG’S MASTERS WEEK!


Editor’s Note: Apologies to last week’s featured writer Danny Morris whose last paragraph of his flowering description  of last week’s match was inadvertently truncated by a member of the editorial staff of the ATAG Reporter. The staff person was immediately dismissed by the Commissioner who has a zero tolerance level for ineptitude of any kind, especially considering that it was an affront to the esteemed Mr. Morris, a founding member of ATAG.

This week’s volunteer scribe is ATAGer Tom Houle, who is quick to let you know that he is a proud Notre Dame grad and, like most of us, admittedly a bad golfer.

April 5, 2016-by Tom Houle

As the great writer for the AJC, Furman Bisher, once wrote about the Masters, “I am thankful for the long shadows that stretch across pristine fairways”. “ I am thankful for the way the light hits the Azaleas in the early morning and fading evening”.

It was a glorious Masters week day at “Ansley Golf Club’s version of Augusta National”. As the photos in the Gallery can attest, the long shadows of hole 15 and the glorious azaleas of hole 10, were in their full glory.

We have Atlanta in the Spring and a great grounds crew to thank for our surroundings, and the big man upstairs to thank for the weather–unfortunately, we have ourselves to blame for our golf game.

Jim Nantz always says the Masters is a tradition unlike any other, and in ATAG, we feel the same– first class friends, great comradery, great food, conversation in a world class facility, and horrible golf. It is truly a tradition unlike any other.

It was a day of “high expectations and dashed hopes,” stated a member of the winning team Mike Schmal, who in addition to taking home the Golden Ale trophy, shared the low gross with playing partner Ron Majors. Mike and Ron also added to their Birdie Club totals as well. As if that was not enough, Mike also had the Shot of the Day on hole 15, with a snaky, over 35 foot birdie putt, that had its final roll right into the hole.

It was a good day for Mike, Ron and the other members of the winning team, Tom Houle and Frank Corrigan who posted the best score of 6 under.

It was also a great day for Craig Sellner who won the big money with his net 2 under, the only player in the field to break par. The prize was somewhat tainted by the fact that one of the dollar bills was reduced by 25 cents due to a felony defacing of the currency by Mr. Majors.

The donating team was the Commish and his stacked team of Steve Bates,  Jeff Kohn and Danny Morris which dropped four shots on the last hole to finish at 2 over.

The conversation on the upper deck revolved around the Masters and the Braves, and the delicious lemon pepper wings. Clay Houle and Jeff McClellan also made cameo appearances. It was a great night had by all.

COMMISSIONER’S COMMENTS:

Thanks to Mr. Houle for his nostalgic comparison of ATAG to the Masters and of the Ansley Golf Club to Augusta National and for also serving as the photographer in the absence of Tim Martin.

This is the second week in a row that the Commissioner’s Team has finished at the bottom of the heap, hopefully not indicating that the Commissioner’s Curse of prior seasons has returned to scourge those randomly paired with the Commish each week. As can be seen by the individual scores below, it was bad golf by pretty much everybody on this day and especially bad golf by Pink Lady winner John Wymer who fired a blistering (literally) 58 for a net 10 over par to set the bar for the “sucked more” moniker of the 2016 season.

That’s it for this week’s recap of the Back Nine match. Check out the photos in the Gallery and scroll down for the individual scores of today’s match.

4-5-2016       Final Results      Back Nine      Gross / Net

Schmal                              42/37

Majors                               42/38

Kohn                                 43/38

Healy                                45/37

Gaddis                              45/39

Bates                                 45/41

Sellner                               46/34

Cowles                                46/36

Player                                  47/37

Gooding                             47/40

McGlynn                            48/38

Williamson                        48/40

Corrigan                             50/39

Buist                                   50/39

Houle                                  50/40

Morris                                 50/43

Kisgen                                  51/39

Nichols                                 51/40

Jobson                                  52/41

Wymer                                  58/46

 

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“ENCHANTING LATE AFTERNOON” ATAG MATCH!


Note: The ATAG Reporter is pleased to provide this week’s commentary by award winning free lance journalist and co-founding member of ATAG Danny Morris.

3-29-2016–By Danny Morris

How best would one describe a night like this past Tuesday?

Let’s see, the sky was a perfect combo of sun, blue sky and high delicate spring clouds. Breeze, light and a little bit cool. Azaleas? Yes, and perfect. Cherry blossoms, still in full color. Red buds, already bursting in their glory. Sunset, hauntingly beautiful. All of that worked together to create the backdrop for an enchanting late afternoon.

Add to that golf, beer, bourbon, crispy fried chicken parts and friendly conversation and you’ve got yourself some enjoyment.

Nineteen guys signed up to play the ATAG format, each prepared to confront the Ansley front nine on this last Tuesday of March. Lee Pearson rounded up late addition and first time ATAG participant Jim Moulton to true up the five foursomes. Play began on the Road Hole Number 1 at 4:42 PM, exactly as arranged and approved by the Commissioner.

The outward nine did not lend itself to much noteworthy play from the assembled twenty. The production was slow even by ATAG standards. At the finish you could see group 2 trudging up to the ATAG deck as group three left the Number 9 green. The fourth group waited on the 9 tee and group five was chipping and putting out on 8. Sixteen golfers were just 200 yards from each other. Two hours twenty five to finish nine holes… the wonder of the spring night and the captivating comradeship within the groups made the delays more than bearable.

The golf round unfolded this way

Most all the groups had a tale describing how many shots they gave up to par on the finishing hole. Four shots for one group dropping them out of the lead. Two or three shots were shed by other foursomes. The pin was, shall we say, in an awkward position. I would guess the professional who placed this cup had a donnybrook at home on Tuesday morning or a rough Monday night or both.

However, everyone had to play the same pin and Jeff Kohn, Doug Gooding, Craig Sellner and Tom Houle won the match with a score that was 9 better than par.

Tim Martin, Russ Jobson, Mike Schmal and Don Nichols were at the bottom of the stack with a 4 under score. The early consensus was this team, loaded with talent and strokes, would win it all. They bought beer for the winners. Of note, Doug Gooding made a trip across the full length of the porch to request his beer from Mike Schmal. Doug said it was not a common occurrence that he was able to collect from Mike S.

COMMISSIONER’S COMMENTS:

The Commissioner wishes to thank Mr. Morris for his elegant and flowery commentary as well as for not pointing out that the Commissioner’s Team followed last week’s boastful victory with a Dead Ass Last showing by this week’s assembly of paltry players. And, speaking of paltry, all but two ATAGers were over par for the day–not counting the last minute visitor who claimed a twenty handicap to sweep the pot. This did not sit well with the fraternity of ATAG players and the Commissioner is considering eliminating future unknown and/or “undocumented” visitors from participating in the Low Net purse. (as someone said as the money was being handed out, “stranger danger.” )

Also, long time ATAGer David Danzig made an early cameo on the porch and stayed through the evening–his first appearance of the season.

The Commissioner is delighted to have the support of  his fellow ATAGers in keeping the ATAG Reporter continuing to serve as the ATAG web site. The Publisher, Word Press, is also appreciative and noted in its 2015 year end review that the ATAG blog was viewed 1,800 tines from fifteen countries (yikes!) and that 144 photos were posted, so no telling the amount of viewership we will have with this collaborative effort going forward this year.

That’s it for this week’s recap. Check out the photo in the Gallery and scroll down for the individual scores from today’s match.

3-29-16 Final Results    Front Nine    Gross/Net

Moulton                                               40/30

Majors                                                   41/36

Kohn                                                       42/36

Williamson                                             43/35

Schmal                                                     43/38

Gaddis                                                      44/37

Pearson                                                     44/39

Morris                                                       45/37

Gooding                                                    46/38

Martin                                                       46/40

Sellner                                                       47/35

Nichols                                                       47/36

Cowles                                                        47/36

Player                                                          47/37

Healy                                                            48/40

Wymer                                                          49/37

Houle                                                             49/39

Corrigan                                                        51/39

Jobson                                                           51/40

McGlynn                                                        52/42

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ATAG REPORTER SHUTS DOWN!


COMMISSIONER SUSPENDS WEEKLY REPORTING!  CITES TIME PRESSURES AND BUDGET CUTS !

But……….wait. Players respond!

After informing the players that he would no longer be reporting the weekly ATAG matches due to a combination of time constraints and burn out, several ATAGers, afraid the “ATAG Experience” would begin to wane, volunteered to serve as “contributing writers” to the weekly ATAG blog which would then enable it to continue as  the de facto web site for ATAG.

There was no reporting of the opening day front nine match on March 15 although the match results are shown further down below. But this past week’s back nine match was  chronicled by  volunteer contributing writer John Wymer whose recap follows:

UNEXPECTED CAMEO SHIFTS SPOTLIGHT AWAY FROM GOLF!

There was electricity (and a lot of pollen) in the air as a full field of veteran ATAGers prepared for the upcoming back-9 match.  The atmosphere in the practice area was eerily similar to that found in the practice area at Augusta during Masters week.  A number of golf aficionados were heard to opine that this was one of the strongest fields ever to assemble for an ATAG match this early in the season.  For the first time all year, the fairways were firm and the ball would actually roll a while before coming to rest.

Despite good conditions and an All-Star field, the scores were not particularly good, due in part to early season rustiness and in part to many of the players’ lack of skill.

Results were as follows:

Winning Team:                -11     Scotty Greene, Brooks Cowles, Ron Majors, Don Nichols

Sponsor:                             -2     Jeff Kohn, Tim Martin, Jim Williamson, John Wymer

Low Gross:                         40    Bill Meagher and Mike Schmal

Low Net:                             -2     Scotty Greene

Pink Lady:                          +8  Craig Sellner and Tim Martin

Birdies:                                Ron Majors, Mike Schmal, William Thornton, Scotty Greene

Shot Of The Day:               Mike Schmal-tee shot on #12 for kick in birdie;

(Honorable Mention to Scotty Greene whose tee shot on #18 was just outside the leather )

Although the golf might have been uninspiring, the post-round comradery was quite spectacular.  As the players were engaging in quiet post-round commiserating, who should appear on the upstairs porch than none other than former Ansley cart girl, Ashley!!!  The lovely Ms. Ashley graciously gave out hugs to the players who, unlike yours truly, were not barricaded behind a table.  Ashley reported that her stint working on some type sailboat is over because, according to her, her boss died.  (I will not even speculate as to the possible cause of death.)  She is about to start a new job as a “fun manager” – that’s right, a fun manager – for a company that operate high-end resorts around the world.  (Danny Morris and I both thought she said “fund manager,” but then sought and obtained clarification.) For those of you who wish to follow her career, her first fun manager assignment is on the island of Exuma in the Bahamas.

Once Ashley left and the gracious sponsors dutifully purchased beverages for the winning team, at least one player, a/k/a, moi, departed because he was freezing his ass off.  With the temperature 65 degrees, a breeze blowing and darkness having descended, presumably others followed your humble scribe’s lead soon thereafter.

COMMISSIONER’S COMMENTS: A great thanks to Mr. Wymer for his contribution. He failed to point out that the winning team was, in fact, the Commissioner’s Team, a victory in its first match since the Commish was unable to attend opening day (but did make a cameo).  (Mr. Wymer also failed to note that he was one of the “gracious sponsors.”)

Also, the field was way oversubscribed and four veteran ATAGers did not make the cut and had to sit out based upon their less than stellar attendance record the prior year. It was also interesting to note when reviewing the scorecards that three players–Schmal, Morris, and Greene– would have tied for low net had it not been for Greene’s birdie on # 18 (and Morris’s bogey on the same hole)

That’s it for this week’s inaugural “contributing writer’s” recap. Check out the photos in the Gallery and scroll down for the individual scores.

Final Leaderboard    3-22-16   Back Nine   Gross / Net

Schmal                                       40/35

Meagher                                     40/37

Greene                                        41/34

Gaddis                                         41/35

Majors                                          41/36

Morris                                           42/35

Kohn                                            44/39

Wymer                                         47/36

Gooding                                       47/39

Nichols                                         48/37

Houle                                           48/38

Cowles                                          48/38

Thornton                                      48/42

Healy                                             49/41

Williamson                                   49/41

Martin                                           50/44

Corrigan                                        51/39

Kisgen                                            51/42

Jobson                                            51/40

Sellner                                             56/44

 

3-15-16  ATAG Results (Opening Day)

16 Players: Front Nine

 Winning Team:   Majors, Wymer, Gaddis, Morris               -11

Sponsors:  Healy, Cowles, Kohn, Morgan                              -5 (tiebreaker)

Pink Lady:  Morgan                                                                +11 net

 Low Gross:  Majors  37

 Low Net: Wymer-skillfully applied his 23 handicap to a score of 43 for a net 31

 Birdies:   Majors (2);  Schmal (1)

 Shot Of The Day:  Majors—chips in on # 9 to the back pin position while standing next to the far right bunker for his second birdie of the day

 Cameos:  The Commissioner arrived on the porch just as the last group was finishing.  Tom Thornhill also made a brief cameo appearance begging to be re-admitted to ATAG. (There was some talk after he left about making him go through a pledge week inititiation)

 Jokes:  Danny Morris opened the season with some new material that was well received.

 Weather: No comment (at the request of Kevin McGlynn)

 Final Results:  Gross/Net

Majors                                  37/32

Schmal                                   39/34                                              

Kohn                                      41/35

Wymer                                  43/31

Morris                                   43/35

Williamson                          43/35

Martin                                   43/36

Thornton                             43/37

Gaddis                                  44/37

Cowles                                 45/34

Greene                                 45/38

Healy                                     47/39

Kisgen                                   48/36

Arnold                                  48/39

McGlynn                              49/36    

Morgan                                57/47                              

 

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SEASON CLOSES ON GORGEOUS DAY! COMMISSIONER TO LEAVE?


October 20, 2015-By Don Nichols

It was undoubtedly the prettiest day of the year that saw the close of the 2015 season–mid 70’s, a gentle breeze, and beautiful azure blue skies mixed with  cumulus clouds. Add that to the pristine fairways and greens of the Ansley Golf Course and no wonder there was a full field of 20 ATAGers who showed up to seek their revenge on the mean back nine. And that they did, posting some of the best back nine scores in weeks.

Tie Breaker Determines Winner!  Two teams brought the back nine to its knees, each posting a net score of 10 under, requiring the card comparison tie breaker on the lowest handicap hole. That comparison revealed the winner of the last Golden Ale Trophy of the season to be the team of Bill Meagher, Jim Williamson, David Danzig, and Mike Gaddis. Presenting the gratuitous cold libation was the woeful team of John Wymer, Jeff Colbath, Tom Houle, and Russ Jobson who finished at +1,  giving the back nine one last jab at an ATAG foursome.

Another Majors Day!  Ron Majors ended up taking both Medalist honors and the Low Net booty, firing a 37 for a net 3 under. (The Commissioner mistakenly announced that David Danzig’s 2 under score was the winner until corrected by the rightful owner Mr. Majors, hence the photo of Danzig in the Gallery dubbed “Dewey Defeats Truman.”

Shot Of The Day!  Danny Morris received Shot Of The Day honors for holing out from the left bunker on #13 to make par-“net birdie” and putting some salve in the wound for what was otherwise, for him, an exasperating day.

Birdie Club Closes Out With 4 More!  The Birdie Club ended up with a total of 87 of the hard to get “one-unders”, with this week’ s deposits coming from David Danzig–with two-and one each from Ron Majors, Jeff Kohn, and Kevin McGlynn with McGlynn making the prestigious roster for the first time this year. There were 26 ATAGers who were admitted into the elite club this year, meaning that four ATAGers were totally shut out (and you know who you are).

Houle Gets The Pinkster! The Commissioner originally announced that Danny Morris and Jeff Colbath would share Pink Lady honors at 8 over,  but a protesting Tom Houle caused the Commish to take a closer post round look at the score cards to see, staring at him, a net score of 11 over posted by Mr. Houle.

Team Results   10-20-15  Back Nine

Danzig, Meagher, Gaddis, Williamson                                                               -10 (tiebreaker)

Buist, McGlynn, Arnold, Majors                                                                          -10

Morris, Kohn, Healy, Nichols                                                                                -7

Greene, Corrigan, Player, Kisgen                                                                         -5

Wymer, Jobson, Houle, Colbath                                                                           +1

Commissioner’s Corner:

-The upper deck was being used for a Club function so the players commandeered the Men’s Grill to learn of the match results and chow down one last time on the chicken wings. The beer was also flowing and it was evident that the famed ATAG camaraderie had indeed been revived and was alive and well leading into next week’s closing ceremonies.

Kevin McGlynn appealed to the Commissioner to remove the letter placed in his file last week for his late cancellation in order to watch the Cubs playoff game, explaining that he had been requested by his 90+ year old mother to watch the game with her in her assisted living facility. The Commish has considered the appeal and, considering the altruistic motive and the fact the Cubs were swept by the Mets in the series, has approved the appeal and removed the castigating letter from his file.

Bill Buist was chastised for his score keeping, failing to circle the birdies on the scorecard. Buist, who has been playing on the ATAG Tour for several years, said that he was not aware of such a requirement and, further, had never seen a birdie before and didn’t know what the fuss was about.

That’s it for the recap of the final ATAG match of the season. You can scroll down for the individual scores and be sure to check out the photos in the Gallery.

It was another great season. There were 27 matches (same as last year) that garnered a total field of 496 players so a pretty good average of 18 players each week. The low net pool totaled $500 and fourteen different players were able to participate in it. As mentioned previously, there were a total of 87 birdies circled on the scorecards and no eagles–although Bill Meagher did have a chip in eagle on # 5  during the cancelled “unofficial” match.

On behalf of ATAG, the Commissioner would like to thank the golf staff of the Ansley Golf Club for arranging for the ATAG tee times each week, with a special thanks to Assistant Pro Tyler Hays for serving as the official ATAG starter. ATAGers are also appreciative of the cart attendants who made sure carts were ready and loaded, of the ATAG bar keeps Connor and Cary who tirelessly climbed the stairs each week to provide the post round food and beverage service, and of ATAG cart girl Courtney who made sure no one would go thirsty while on the course.

Well, folks, this could be the last issue of the ATAG Reporter as the Commissioner is not sure if he will return next season. As reported in the 4-17-15 issue of this paper, the Commissioner and the ATAG Compensation Committee could not come to terms on a contract extension beyond the 2015 season. Talks progressed throughout the year but mediation efforts failed, and the Commish has now become a free agent and has been contacted by other private clubs including an overture from the national Mediocre Golf Association (they even have their own web site–www.mgatour.com).

Whatever the outcome,  it has been a pleasure chronicling the play and behavior of the ATAG Tour players over all these years, and one need only to scroll down the Gallery section to see season after season unfold before one’s eyes. I look forward to next week’s closing ceremonies.

Final Leaderboard  10-20-15  Back Nine   Gross/Net

Majors                                                       37/33

Meagher                                                    38/35

Williamson                                               43/36

Kohn                                                           43/39

Gaddis                                                        44/38

Nichols                                                       45/35

Greene                                                         45/38

Danzig                                                          46/34

Buist                                                              46/35

Healy                                                             46/38

McGlynn                                                       47/37

Jobson                                                           49/39

Kisgen                                                             50/38

Wymer                                                            50/39

Arnold                                                             50/41

Player                                                               51/41

Morris                                                              51/44

Colbath                                                             52/42

Houle                                                                53/47

Corrigan                                                            54/42

 

 

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FRONT NINE CAPITULATES! BACK NINE AWAITS NEXT WEEK’S FINALE!


October 13, 2015-By Don Nichols

It was the penultimate match of the 2015 season and 20 ATAGers eagerly stepped up to the first tee for their last crack at the Front Nine which has been known to be more “player friendly” –and that proved to be the case this week, as the “Friendly Front” graciously cooperated by allowing some of the best team scores to date.

13 Under Wins It!  The last pairing of David Danzig, Brooks Cowles, William Thornton, and Scotty Greene came out on top with a net score of 13 under, dashing the hopes of the Commissioner’s Team who knew their score of 11 under had thus far bested the other teams. Two teams battled it out for sponsorship rights, but the team of Doug Healy, Russ Jobson, Jeff Colbath, and Doug Healy cleared up that issue and ended the suspense by dropping two shots on the last hole to finish DAL at 7 under.

Meagher is Medalist Again!  Six handicapper Bill Meagher topped the field with the best score of the day, posting a 39, for his 10th Low Gross honor this season.

Danzig Takes Low Net at 4 under!  Twenty five handicapper David Danzig collected the 20 dollar booty after posting a 45, his best score this season and a marked improvement over his last front nine score of 52.

Gooding Has Pink Face! Fourteen handicapper Doug Gooding took home his third Pink Lady of the season, posting a net 7 over par after a plethora of double bogeys on the (to him) not so friendly front nine.

Birdie Club Avoids Shutout!  There was only one birdie circled on the five scorecards and that belonged to the low net winner David Danzig who added his second tweeter of the year after making birdie on # 2.

Corrigan Nominated For Shot Of The Day!  Playing partner Lee Pearson nominated Frank Corrigan for Shot Of The Day. Blocked out behind the trees on #5, Corrigan skillfully managed to slice the ball out and around the trees to end up in the middle of the fairway setting up the opportunity to make birdie or par. (He did neither so it remains a “nomination.”)

Final Team Results: 10-13-15 Front Nine

Thornton, Danzig, Greene, Cowles                                                             -13

Meagher, Majors, Martin, Nichols                                                              -11

Williamson, Wymer, Arnold, Kisgen                                                          -10

Pearson, Corrigan, Sellner, Morris                                                              -8

Healy, Gooding, Jobson, Colbath                                                                 -7

Commissioner’s Corner:

-Another great night on the porch–beer flowing and wings flying amongst multiple conversations around the tables.

-A snafu in the tee time reservations caused two non ATAG pairings to be intermingled with the ATAG teams which delayed the start of the last group but it was able to finish before dark.

Brooks Cowles was struck in the neck (see Gallery) while standing on the number 2 tee box by a misguided line drive approach shot to number 1 green from a non ATAG foursome. No serious injury but Brooks, who is a lawyer, may later consider his options.

Kevin McGlynn and Mike Gaddis were late cancellations–Kevin opted for the Cubs playoff game over ATAG and Mike claimed last minute work interference. Fortunately their spots were quickly filled but a letter was nevertheless placed in each of their files.

Scotty Greene left before the match results were announced but was excused since he was a last minute substitution for one of the vacant spots. And, since he was on the winning team, his free brewsky went to the Commissioner in accordance with ATAG protocol.

-Former ATAGer Ben Cass made a cameo appearance on the porch.

That’s it for this week’s recap. Next week we close out the season with the dastardly back nine, and the Commissioner has challenged next week’s field to get its revenge and bring the bugbear back nine links to its knees.

Scroll down for the individual scores from today’s match and check out the photos in the Gallery.

Final Leaderboard  10-13-15   Front Nine    Gross/Net

Meagher                                                                    39/36

Pearson                                                                      40/35

Healy                                                                           41/33

Morris                                                                         42/34

Martin                                                                         43/35

Greene                                                                         43/36

Thornton                                                                     44/37

Majors                                                                          44/39

Danzig                                                                           45/32

Williamson                                                                   45/37

Kisgen                                                                            46/34

Nichols                                                                           47/36

Jobson                                                                            48/36

Cowles                                                                             48/38

Arnold                                                                             48/38

Sellner                                                                             48/38

Corrigan                                                                           50/38

Colbath                                                                             50/40

Gooding                                                                            50/43

Wymer                                                                               52/41

 

 

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OVERSUBSCRIBED FIELD! BACK NINE CRUEL AGAIN!


October 6, 2015-By Don Nichols

Well, looks like it worked. It seems that whenever you take something for granted, and then are told it was being taken away, it suddenly becomes important again. That was the case this week when the C0mmissioner’s Call For Players (after announcing the season would not be cancelled) elicited an oversubscribed response from 25 players, confirming that the ATAG spirit had indeed been rekindled. The Commish unfortunately had to deny five players from making the cut, basing the criteria on a combination of seniority and year to date attendance.

Since the last “official” ATAG match was an apathetic showing by only 11 players on the more arduous back nine, the Commissioner decided to repeat the back nine challenge with this week’s full slate of highly motivated players. It was a beautiful day, the motivation was there, but the caliber of play was almost as bad as the previous attempt, as the back nine proved even more difficult thanks to a few days of rain that produced little or no roll on the fairways, a wet and more grabbing rough, and greens slower than normal. The results?  Out of a 20 player field, the winning team score was only 3 under, the losing score was 1 over, the average individual gross score was 12 over, the average net score was 4 over, and there was only one player who ended up net under par (and that, barely).  No Shots Of The Day were reported and the Birdie Club narrowly avoided a shut out thanks to one lonely and late arriving birdie on # 16 by Mike Schmal.

Here are today’s dismal results:

Best Gross Score:  43   Tim Martin

Best Net Score:      35   Kevin McGlynn (his first this season)

Pink Lady:              +9  Marty Arnold (his 5th of the year)

Birdies:                    1     Mike Schmal

Winning Team:   -3 Ron Majors, Jeff Colbath, Danny Morris, Doug Gooding

Sponsor:               -1 John Wymer, Mike Schmal, William Thornton, Tom Houle

Other Teams:

-2    Kevin McGlynn, Bill Meagher, Marty Arnold, Scotty Greene

-2   Frank Corrigan, Doug Healy, Jim Williamson, Tim Martin

-1    Tom Kisgen, Brooks Cowles, Craig Sellner, Don Nichols

Commissioner’s Corner:

-The early 4:05 pm start enabled all five teams to finish before dark, and the first group to finish had dutifully made sure there were enough tables and chairs to accommodate everyone.

-The mood was upbeat, the ATAG bar keeps got a work out climbing the stairs to keep the beer flowing, and there was no short supply of chicken wings which were readily scarfed up. After the match results were announced, the conversations turned to mostly separate table discussions which is usually the case when there are no jokes or stories to be told, but all in all the ATAG camaraderie was never more present.

Only two more matches left, the friendly front nine next week and then, fittingly, one more crack a the unruly back nine.

Doug Healy did grab the attention of the crowd to announce that the ATAG end of the year party would be held on Tuesday-October 27–at 5:30 pm at the same venue as last  year.

That’s it for this week’s match recap. Scroll down for the individual scores and check out the photos in the Gallery.

Individual Scores:  10-6-15 Back Nine   Gross/Net

Martin                    43/36

Schmal                   44/39

Majors                    44/40

Meagher                 44/41

McGlynn                 45/35

Healy                        45/37

Morris                      45/38

Nichols                     47/37

Colbath                     48/38

Thornton                  48/42

Wymer                       49/38

Greene                       49/42

Williamson                50/43

Gooding                      50/43

Kisgen                          51/41

Houle                          51/43

Sellner                          52/40

Corrigan                        53/41

Arnold                           54/45

 

 

 

 

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PLAYERS IGNORE MATCH CANCELLATION AND TAKE MATTERS INTO THEIR OWN HANDS!


NOTE: The Commissioner cancelled this past Tuesday’s ATAG match after an all day rain that soaked the golf course even though the rain had stopped by late afternoon and there was some risk that more rain was on the way. The Commissioner didn’t think there would be any back lash considering the recent apathy amongst the players that had caused the Commish to earlier announce that he was going to cancel the rest of the season. However, there was indeed a back lash–as a group of vigilante ATAGers , in an unprecedented move, ignored the cancellation notice and made their way to the first tee, refusing to be denied their weekly ATAG fix.

Core ATAGer Doug Healy took it upon himself to take charge of the band of rebels and offers the following recap of the cancelled match.

10-29-15 ATAG SPIRIT ALIVE AND WELL!-By Doug Healy

It had been a tough week for the ATAG group. After last week’s low attendance rating, bad golf and an after party that had all the excitement of sitting shiva (look it up), the Commissioner announced that the remainder of the season would be cancelled. Not surprisingly, this was met with an outpouring of emails that for the most part pleaded “say it’s not so”, but talk is cheap and there was an undertone of uncertainty about the future of the group. Finally, the Commissioner released the call for players and things seemed back on track with a nearly full field of 17 signed up for the match. Then things took a turn for the worse. A full day of soaking rain had everyone on edge and another barrage of emails was circulated for the most part encouraging everyone to stay the course. It felt like we were in the Georgia locker room right before kickoff. Then, out of nowhere, 90 minutes before tee off, came a terse email from the Commissioner. After relying on what was clearly a “phoned in” forecast from ATAG meteorologist Jim (Cantore) Williamson, he announced that “this was not a good day for golf and that we would try again next week”.

More emails and more chatter, but then something incredible. In what has to be the greatest outpouring of support in the history of ATAG, 12 of the 17 players who signed up made a determined march up Montgomery Ferry Rd. to the first tee. Ansley member Chris Darley joined the group as a guest and it was clear the match was on. Without the Commissioner’s highly organized tee sheet, things were in chaos. Acting only on the authority of a field promotion to Acting Commissioner, this correspondent reorganized the players into groups as they showed and sent them on their way.

In the end, there was no rain until after the completion of the match, the course was only moderately soggy and the quality of play was pretty much on par which is to say, with the usual exceptions, not that good. Because of the unruly tee times, one group went off as a fivesome and one draw partner was selected to even things out.

The winning group of Martin, Darley, Meagher and Cowles posted a -6, somewhat below average for the front nine, but enough to beat out the second place team of Sellner, Arnold, Schmal and Kohn who came in at -5. Coming in DAL and sponsoring the winners with the coveted free brew were Healy, Majors, Jobson (dropped in the draw), McGlynn and Greene at -1. Low net was a tie between Scotty Greene and Chris Darley at -1, however the weather precluded the traditional chip off. It was then determined that the pot would be split, but in a grand gesture (which probably saved his life) Chris declined his share of the winnings and Scotty lunged across the table to gather in the dough. The shot of the day unquestionably goes to Bill Meagher who “War Eagled” #5 with a chip in from 12 yards off the green and the Pink Lady went to yours truly who limped in 51/43 after carding four 7’s on the round.

The rain, which did not begin to fall until after the last group finished, forced the group into the Grille for a boisterous after party where everyone congratulated themselves on a fine showing of ATAG spirit.

Individual Results:

Martin 45/38

Darley 41/35

Meagher 39/36

Cowles NA (missed #1 replaced for 1 hole by Jobson)

Sellner 52/39

Arnold 48/38

Schmal 42/37

Kohn 44/38

Healy 51/43

Majors 48/44

Jobson (drawn onto Team 1 for 1 hole) 48/37

McGlynn 51/41

Greene 43/35

Commissioner’s Corner:

The Commissioner is delighted to see that the ATAG spirit has been rekindled and thus is retracting his previous decision to cancel the season. Also,  he will not seek any disciplinary action against those insurgents who defied the Commissioner’s cancellation notice.

However, the statistics from this random unauthorized gathering will not be recorded (the match was, in fact, cancelled and it would not be fair to those who followed ATAG protocol and stayed at home)

Look for the Call For Players for next week’s official match early Monday morning. Three more weeks left in the 2015 season!

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