October 11, 2016-By Don Nichols
On what can best be described as a spectacular Fall afternoon–75 degrees, slight breeze, and blue skies (with the moon making an appearance high in the sky later in the afternoon)-the stage was set for nineteen ATAGers who gathered on the back nine for the penultimate match of the 2016 season. (that’s next to last for those who are vocabulary challenged).
The golf course was also spectacular with its manicured greens and plush fairways that seemed to beckon against the backdrop of the Midtown Atlanta office buildings rising above the crescent. With its urban location in the central city core of a major metropolitan city, the historic nine hole Ansley Golf Course simply has no peer, and ATAGers (as well as all Ansley golfing members) appreciate and relish the opportunity to experience its splendor.
Ok, enough about the setting. Now on to the results of this week’s match.
The sponsor was quickly ascertained to be the 2 under team of Bill Meagher, Jeff Colbath, Jim Williamson, and Frank Corrigan. Scorekeeper Meagher was overheard saying, “We’re not only bad, but stupid” after they discovered they played the wrong tee box on #12.
There was some drama as to who would be the winning team after the other four teams all finished at 6 under. However, one of those teams was the Commissioner’s Team, a threesome of Ron Majors, John Wymer, and Don Nichols, who were entitled to randomly draw a partner out of the pool of 16 eligible players, needing only a one shot improvement to capture the Golden Ale. Danny Morris quickly raised his hand and volunteered to be such draw partner and was just as quickly dismissed by the group with a chorus of boos. The Commissioner then asked Bill Meagher to shuffle the scorecards and John Wymer then selected the number 7 on behalf of the Commissioner’s Team. With 16 guys hanging on the edge of their seats to see if they would get the free brewsky, the number 7 player out of the sixteen turned out to be—who else, but Danny Morris. Go figure. Morris’s score of the first hole was good enough to propel the Commissioner’s Team to victory and he later added two more for a final draw partner winning team score of 9 under.
LOW GROSS WENT TO BILL MEAGHER WITH A 37 . This matched Ron Majors, Mike Schmal, and Tom Thornhill for the BEST LOW GROSS OF THE YEAR. Meagher is quick to tell you that Low Gross Medalist winners get little recognition amidst an ATAG group of mid to high handicappers, hence the bold all cap as a means of such recognition.
Low New Winner was Tim Martin whose score of 39 resulted in a net of 4 under and 19 one dollar bills in his pocket. Oddly, it was only Martin’s second low net of the year after winning five times last year to earn the Sandbagger Of The Year award.
The hands down winner of the Pink Lady was Jeff Colbath who fashioned four triples and two doubles mixed in with two bogeys and one inexplicable par, for a score of 55 and a net 9 over par for his third pinkster of the year. Teammate Bill Meagher was overheard saying ” if we were playing the Stapleford points system, Jeff would get one point more than a dead man.” (We’re a tough crowd)
The Birdie Club added two more to its totals thanks to a double contribution from Bill Meagher (#13 and #17) and a lone bird from Tom Thornhill (#12)
Shot Of The Day went to Danny Morris. I did not witness it, but here is how it went down according to Morris and other eye witnesses. An errant tee shot on #15 found Morris in the rough between # 15 and # 16. Electing to play it safe, Morris attempted to punch a six iron back out to the fairway but the ball apparently did not cooperate. As Morris tells it, he then raised his six iron into the air in a modest show of frustration when a sudden force of gravity propelled the club from his hands into a nearby tree–where it remained. An attempt to retrieve the club by throwing his 7 iron at it failed, with the 7 iron giving serious thought about joining his 6 iron friend in the tree– but thankfully fell back to the ground. Teammate Tim Martin, who was driving a cart, then attempted a rescue by standing on the cart but to no avail. Then, in a desperate measure, the 250 pound Martin reportedly stood on top of the cart’s roof and was then able to retrieve the recalcitrant 6 iron. (The cart number is not being disclosed for liability reasons.)
Jeff Kohn was a late cancellation (3 pm) (forgot about an eye exam) that resulted in the Commissioner’s Team having to play as a threesome. It is not written in the ATAG Bylaws, but Ron Majors has proposed an amendment that states that “cancelling an appearance on the coveted Commissioner’s Team is punishable by loss of your ATAG Tour Card.” Considering the ATAG Draw Partner system worked to perfection, the Commissioner sees no reason to endorse such a proposal.
It was lively on the porch and the ATAG camaraderie was never more evident as the beers flowed and the conversations covered most of the issues of the day, especially the Presidential Election where both ATAG conservatives and liberals agree that there is not a suitable candidate. This prompted the Commissioner to announce that he was voting for ATAG CFO Doug Healy as a write in candidate. Healy quickly responded that “he would not run and if elected he would not serve.” The Commissioner then wondered out loud if he should run as the ATAG Commissioner on a third party write in ballot. Healy said, “well, let’s stop and think about it. There are 32 members on the ATAG roster so the Commissioner should expect receiving as much as 8 votes.” So, I got that going for me.
Well, that’s it for this week. Next week is the finale and the following Tuesday will be the end of the year awards ceremony. Hard to believe that yet another season is soon to pass.
Check out the photos in the Gallery and scroll down for the individual scores.
Final Leaderboard: 10-11-16 Back Nine Gross/Net