PINK LADY STOOD UP AND BROOKS “REPLY ALL” COWLES ROLLS TO PERSONAL BEST!


Note: This week’s recap is provided by Ron Majors, continuing in his role as one of the four volunteer substitute commissioners dedicated to keeping ATAG going.

7-18-2017-By Ron Majors

Play began a few minutes before the scheduled 5:00PM start under beautiful skies and a friendly temperature producing nearly ideal scoring conditions for this week’s competition on the usually formidable Back 9. The field responded with such enthusiasm and skill that the Pink Lady was left standing at the altar, an event unheard of in this reporter’s memory (more on that later). However, the real story of the evening was the play of Brooks Cowles, a career double digit (currently 20) handicapper, who recorded a personal best score for 9 holes of 39, net 29. Brooks’ record performance propelled him and his teammates Kevin McGlynn, Ed McCormack and Tom Griscom to a net team score of -11 and the golden ale courtesy of the DAL Team 4 of David Danzig, Tom Lewis, Jim Rowley, and Old Tom Player.

TEAM AND INDIVIDUAL SCORES

Team 1: -6 Ron Majors(42/39), Danny Morris(44/36), Tom Thornhill(42/37), Doug Gooding(41/34)

Team 2: -11 Kevin McGlynn(48/38), Ed McCormack(48/35), Brooks Cowles(39/29), Tom Griscom(47/39)

Team 3: -7 Tim Martin(45/38), Scotty Greene(44/36), Tom Kisgen(48/36), Tom Houle(48/39)

Team 4: -5 David Danzig(52/41), Tom Lewis(45/33), Jim Rowley(48/40), Old Tom Player(48/38)

LOW GROSS AND LOW NET

Brooks Cowles, a career 20 handicapper, fired a sizzling personal best 39/29 to win both honors and collected a golden ale along with $16 for his efforts.

BIRDIE CLUB

Hole #12: Brooks Cowles

Hole #14: Tom Houle, Ron Majors

PINK LADY

The poor thing wasn’t asked to the prom as the quality of the individual play was remarkably stellar as evidenced by the net scores. She is anxiously awaiting the return of last week’s co winners Frank Corrigan and Craig Sellner to regain her dubious place in the spotlight.   (Commissioner’s Note: Substitute Commissioner Majors was understandably benevolent in not singling out a Pink Lady winner this week due to the fact that the highest net score was a respectable net 5 over par. Nevertheless, such net score (by “Double D”), though respectable,  was the highest in the field and thus shall be so recorded in the stats. I know, it’s a tough crowd)

COMMISSIONER WATCH

No sighting this week…Commish allegedly out of town.

OF NOTE

Brooks Cowles lifted his personal ban on “Reply All” email communications and, in fact, encouraged its use when reporting on his personal best score.

Old Tom Player rattled his team mates when, contemplating his chip onto the #18 green, he stated that he “wanted to come between their balls.” Only Tom Lewis maintained his composure and made his putt for par.

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RECORD FIELD, THREATENING SKIES – LIGHTING DELAYS, NEARLY CANCEL THIS WEEK’S COMPETITION


NOTE: This week’s recap is provided by Substitute ATAG Commissioner Ron Majors, one of the four loyalist Volunteer “Substitute Commissioners” that keep ATAG rolling along without Commissioner Don Nichols who remains on a leave of absence. In an oversubscribed field, Mr. Majors showed his staunch allegiance to ATAG by unselfishly giving up his spot as a player in the field, relegating himself to be the starter and then checking on the players during the course of their rounds, tabulating the match results and announcing the winners and the day’s sponsor, and finally taking the time to provide this chronicle of the day’s match.

July 11, 2017-By Ron Majors

This week’s Call For Players was answered with a frenzied flurry of entries which exceeded ATAG’s normal allocation of 5 tee times. Five would be players were placed on the wait list and promptly expressed their disappointment with the prospect of being left out of this week’s competition. But William Thornton “rose” to the occasion and secured a formerly unachievable 6th tee time setting the stage for an email frenzy never observed in ATAG history. No good deed goes unpunished. Cancellations, requests for specific tee times, questioning of ATAG sanctioning and plain old confusion produced a volume of emails that prompted Brooks “Reply All” Cowles to scold his fellow ATAGers for excessive use of the Reply All button. The pre-round confusion and controversy was finally resolved and the players prepared to take the field.

The record field of 6 foursomes was poised and ready to play the friendly Front 9 when they experienced two consecutive lightning strike delays which delayed the start of play approximately one hour. Even then the skies were threating and radar was not promising. But play began under a dark cloud cover that miraculously didn’t produce any rain and was completed without further difficulty except for the usual assortment of bad decisions, poor shot making and erratic putting.

Team 6, lead by none other than the aforementioned William Thornton, and consisting of team mates Old Tom Player, Anthony Morgan, and Tom Lewis carded a solid -11 to take first place and receive the Golden Ale Trophy from the DAL Team 1 of Tom Kisgen, Frank Corrigan, Jeff Kohn, and Tom Houle who scored a paltry +5. Tom Houle was so devastated by his team’s poor play that he left without the final compilation of the scores (a letter of reprimand was placed in his ATAG personnel file).

TEAM AND INDIVIDUAL SCORES

Team 1: +5 Tom Kisgen(56/42), Frank Corrigan(56/44), Jeff Kohn(46/40), Tom Houle(51/42)

Team 2: -3 Tim Martin(49/42), Ed McCormack(56/43), Lee Pearson(38/33), Craig Sellner(57/44)

Team 3: -7 Don Nichols (52/40), Bill Meagher(39/36), Danny Morris(46/37), John Wymer(51/40)

Team 4: -4 Scotty Greene(43/35), Doug Gooding(47/40), Doug Healy(45/38), Kieran Quinn(a lot)

Team 5: -8 Russ Jobson(50/38), Jeff Colbath(49/37), David Danzig(45/34), Tom Thornhill(40/34)

Team 6: -11 William Thornton(42/34), Old Tom Player( 48/37), Anthony Morgan(42/37),Tom Lewis(43/35)

LOW GROSS AND LOW NET

Lee Pearson, a 10 handicapper, fired a 38/33 round to win both honors and collected the record $24 purse.

BIRDIE CLUB

Hole #1: Lee Pearson

Hole #2: Tom Thornhill, William Thornton, Anthony Morgan,

Hole #9: Scotty Greene, John Wymer, Danny Morris

COMMISSIONER WATCH

The field welcomed back Don Nichols, aka “the Commish”, to his second consecutive appearance. Is he back for good or was this just an aberration? Only time will tell. Stay tuned. Commissioner’s Comment: Glad to see that ATAG can run smoothly without me, so will continue enjoying my retirement as the official ATAG Commissioner. Why give up a good thing?

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OH WHAT A GREAT DAY!-GREAT WEATHER-FULL 20 PLAYER FIELD-ATAG COMMISSIONER DON NICHOLS MAKES HIS 2017 DEBUT-BILL MEAGHER ACES #18!


June 27, 2017-By Doug Healy

The headline pretty much says it all. We had a full turnout for what was to become a red letter day in ATAG history. Taking only a few practice chips before striding to the first tee, Commissioner Nichols immediately parred the first hole showing that his self-imposed layoff had little effect on his game – at least on that hole. Too bad his playing partner did not record his net 3 properly and as a result understated their team score by a stroke. No harm done though as a one stroke pick up made no difference in the eventual outcome of the match. Truth be told, there were side bets on the Commissioner’s final 9 hole score covering a wide array of outcomes, but no money changed hands.

No question that the highlight of the night was Bill Meagher who knocked in his 6th career ace on #18 with a 6 iron from 165 yards. The ball flew straight at the pin and with a bounce or two dropped in with teammates shouting and numerous spectators applauding from the porch. This was the selfless act of a man, who after single handedly carrying his team for 8 holes, reached deep to give his all keeping us out of DAL by a mere 2 strokes. You can do the math. This was only the second recorded ATAG hole in one, the other coming from former ATAG’er Bill Benning on #9,  (137 yd wedge)an event he still reminds us of in occasional emails. In a generous show of support, the new men’s grill was overwhelmed with thirsty patrons looking to get in on the traditional free drink. It was later stated that the $250.00 house max on free drinks via the Hole in One Club was reached in less than 30 minutes – an impressive feat when you consider that we have only 2 bartenders. Congrats to Bill.

The winning team of Thornhill, Kohn, Gooding and Danzig posted an outstanding-12 including birdies on 13 by Kohn and 14 by Gooding. Mr. Gooding had a particularly successful round coming in at 40/33. DAL was team 4 including Colbath, Cowles, Schmal, and Greene at -1, a desultory showing even on the difficult back 9. Close review of their scorecard was impossible due to scratchy penmanship and excessive cross-outs.

Team 2 with Martin, Majors, McGlynn and Player put up a respectable -8 picking up 7 strokes between 13 and 16. Ron Majors had a very solid round with 36/32 winning both low gross and low net. Teams 3 with Williamson, Healy, Meagher and Lewis and Team 1 with Gaddis, Morris, Nichols, and Sellner demonstrated the “hollowing out” of the middle class by posting -3 and -2 respectively. Craig Sellner ran away with the Pink Lady shooting 60/47. Shot of the day, which in all likelihood will be shot of the year, goes to Bill Meagher for his hole in one on #18.

The final item this week is a LOUD ATAG THANK YOU to Scotty Greene for once again opening up his house to the group for Steak Night. This year’s event was well attended by 24 members even after a last minute rescheduling due to inclement weather. This year, Master Chefs Craig Sellner and Jeff Colbath grilled the steaks to perfection despite working under the most challenging conditions. Scotty’s monstrous backyard gas grilling station failed to ignite requiring the Chefs to improvise on a couple of Green Eggs including one in next door neighbor Ed McCormack’s yard. You can expect to see their stunning performance on TV later this year. Thanks also to Jim Williamson, Ron Majors, and Kevin McGlynn for their assistance in organizing this popular event.

There will be no ATAG next Tuesday July 4th.

COMMISSIONER’S COMMENT: A great thanks to the warm welcome given me by all the players including Assistant Pro Tyler Hays and ATAG Cart Girl Courtney Phillips who, I might add,  ran to give me a hug when I inadvertently passed by her grumbling about missing a short putt (one of many that day). It was good to see the ATAG spirit alive and well on a special afternoon  (noted cameos by William Thornton and Frank Corrigan) that saw only the second Hole In One in ATAG History (10 years apart almost to the day) and the mood was definitely upbeat on the newly designed and expanded Men’s Grill Porch. The chicken wings were once again plentiful and it did not go without notice that the replenished winged wonders were personally brought out by our own General Manager David Sheppard.

The long layoff from golf apparently had little effect on my game as I picked up right where I left off when I contemplated giving up the game—resuming my mastery of doing whatever it takes on each hole to make the bogey instead of the par, the double bogey instead of the bogey, and the triple instead of the double. (On a positive note, the President of the Atlanta chapter of Bad Golfers Anonymous reached out and told me that they are still holding a space for me, but I had to agree to be committed.)

That being said, it was very relaxing to be around my golf buddies again without the responsibilities that have now been assumed by Doug Healy and the Substitute Commissioners. (sounds like a rock band) I now find myself anxiously awaiting the “newsletter write up” each week to see who did what and hope to play more ATAG rounds this year. Regardless, I  look forward to continuing to monitor ATAG, record the weekly stats and publish the ATAG Reporter.

Team and individual scores as follows:

Team 1 (-2) – Gaddis 46/40, Morris 45/36, Nichols 51/40, Sellner 60/47

Team 2 (-8) – Martin 43/36, Majors 36/32, McGlynn 55/43, Player 50/39

Team 3 (-3) – Williamson 45/37, Healy 50/44, Meagher 37/34, Lewis 48/40

Team 4 (-1) – Colbath 51/40, Cowles 48/39, Schmal 42/36, Greene 42/35

Team 5 (-12) – Thornhill 42/37, Kohn 39/34, Gooding 45/40, Danzig 48/37

 

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WINGGATE INVESTIGATIONS CONCLUDE AND RELIEVED ATAGERS RESPOND WITH EXCELLENT PLAY ON THE FRONT NINE!


 By: Doug Healy  6-13-17

15 players distinguished themselves in a very fine outing where 4 teams finished between -8 and -13. The winning team of Healy, Danzig, Gaddis and Schmal rode Mr. Danzig the entire way to a -13 finish. Danzig fired a 43 including a birdie on #5 and a long putt on #6 for a net 3. The team was hot from the start gaining ground on every hole including a 3 stroke pick up on #5. After his round, Danzig, perhaps looking skyward and offering thanks, took a great photo of sunset on #9 (see the Gallery). Team 5, with 3 Toms and a Tim, came in DAL at -8 which on most days is good enough to keep you out of the buy zone and perhaps even win. That was not the case on this day after dropping 2 strokes on #7 and 1 more on #8. The first team off including Cowles, Colbath, Corrigan and Buist posted a very respectable -11 and I am sure they were sitting smugly in the clubhouse for quite some time expecting an easy win. Brooks knocked in birdies on #4 and #7 with Colbath adding one on #7 as well leading to a 5 stroke pick up on that hole. Team 3 with McCormack, Williamson and Morris finished at -7 but dug themselves out of a hole with the addition of 4 strokes courtesy of draw partner Mike Gaddis

The highlight of the evening was a 3 way tie for low net at 32 between Brooks Cowles, Danny Morris and David Danzig. Jumping in between groups coming in on #9 for the chip off, the Substitute Commissioner placed the ball generously in spot that seemed likely to create a close finish. Not so. First up was Danzig who promptly skulled the ball back into the fairway and then Danny Morris managed to strike the ball twice before it was 12 inches in the air for a DQ. That left the contest open for Cowles who only had to land the ball on the green from about 7 feet to take the bounty. That was easily accomplished and he quickly grabbed the $15 and set off for home.

Birdies were made by Cowles (2), Colbath and Danzig. The Pink Lady at +3 was delivered to Tom Player, which after review was actually a tie with his playing partner Tom Lewis. Low gross was a tie between Mikes (Schmal and Gaddis) at 41 with Danny Morris just 1 stroke back at 42. There were no other shots of the day reported, and I would be remiss not to recognize Danzig’s long putts on #5 for net birdie and #6 for net eagle.

Individual and team scores as follows:

Team 1 (-11): Cowles 42/32, Colbath 48/36, Corrigan 49/37, Buist 47/36 (Note Buist dropped 3 strokes off his handicap by teeing from the whites not realizing that after he left the box we determined that the right number should have been 2) Sorry about that.

Team 2 (-8): Martin 45/38, Kisgen 49/37, Player 50/39 Lewis 48/39

Team 3 (-11): McCormack 51/38, Williamson 44/36, Morris 42/32

Team 4 (-13): Healy 44/37, Danzig 43/32, Gaddis 41/3

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COMMISSIONER’S SURPRISE CAMEO APPEARANCE HIGHLIGHTS THE REOPENING OF THE MEN’S GRILL !


RUSS JOBSON INADVERTENTLY STEALS THE CHICKEN WINGS FROM THE LIPS OF 18 HUNGRY ATAG’ERS!

6-6-17 ATAG-By Doug Healy

Commissioner Don Nichols, who many had thought passed away in 2016, made a surprise cameo appearance to highlight ATAG’s return to the newly refurbished men’s grill and porch. The ATAG’ers welcomed him back with free drinks (Commissioner’s Note: just one free drink from Jim Williamson but it was appreciated )and handshakes while he held court in the new throne room. Continuing to remain non-committal on a possible return to competition, he did perform the traditional ritual of collecting the scorecards and announcing the winners/losers of the evening’s match.

The new facilities are a masterpiece of design and comfort and earned universal acclaim and appreciation from the ATAG’ers. A sincere “thank you” to our Board, Dave Sheppard and all those who were involved in making this possible.

Once again the weather, which turned out to be fine despite an earlier light rain, played an outsized role in the evening’s events. In a casual stroll through the grill earlier in the afternoon, Russ Jobson (Co-winner of Golf Magazine’s Player of the Year Award – See Photo Gallery) suggested to Bar Keep Kerry that the threat of rain had cancelled the match for the day. Assuming that anyone whose picture was on the cover of Golf Magazine was in fact a serious authority figure, Kerry did the only thing he could do – he cancelled the wings. Coming in hot and hungry after shooting a 49, an enraged Jim Williamson (think about that) was the first to realize what had happened. By that time, nothing could be done other than to file a scathing report with the Substitute Commissioners who will deal with this infraction at a time and place of their choosing. (Commissioner’s Note: I hope so because I quite frankly came for the free chicken wings.) It is also worth noting that Mr. Jobson was nowhere to be seen that night ( a no-notice no show) perhaps realizing too late that he had really stepped in it this time.

A nearly full field of 18 players contested the back nine with the winning team of Morris, Kisgen, Majors and Rowley finishing with a very respectable -8. Mr. Morris delivered a net 33 which also blew away the field for low net. Jim Rowley made his first appearance at an ATAG match and drew gasps from the crowd as he teed off from the whites (see Photo Gallery) but finished with a respectable net par. Coming in at DAL was the team of Williamson (no wonder he was mad), Wymer and Player. As a threesome finishing at +8, their only hope was drawing Jordan Speith as a partner who, as it turned out, was unavailable. Instead, they got Tom Kisgen who, despite delivering a full 5 strokes, was unable to lift them above +3 which still left them comfortably in last place. Tom Player ran away with the Pink Lady carding an unchallenged net 48. In second place with -3, the team of McGlynn, McCormack, Kisgen and Buist played a pretty steady round dropping only 1 stroke on #17. A -1, after dropping 3 strokes on # 18, was good enough to finish in 3rd place which came as a big surprise to the team of Martin, Healy, Cowles and Kohn who fully expected to be buying the beer. The team of Colbath, Danzig and Schmal, also a threesome with the benefit of a 4 stroke draw partner, closed at even par after recovering from 5 over as they walked off #12. In our good golf category, the Birdie Club received deposits from Schmal on #17 and Cowles on #10. Low gross went to Ron Majors with a 40.  

Again, our first evening in the new facilities was terrific with several participants lingering in front of the fireplace seating area well into the night to exchange barbeque recipes.

Individual and team scores as follows:

Team 1 (+3) – Williamson 49/40, Wymer 51/41, Player 58/48

Team 2 (-8) – Morris 42/33, Lewis 52/44, Majors 40/37, Rowley 45/36

Team 3 (-1) – Martin 47/40, Healy 46/39, Cowles 45/36, Kohn 48/43

Team 4 (-3) – McGlynn 50/40, McCormack 54/41, Kisgen 50/39, Buist 47/36

Team 5 (0) – Colbath 53/42, Danzig 50/39, Schmal 45/40

 

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ATAG WINDOW OPENS!


Editor’s Note: This week’s recap is provided by ATAG co-founder Danny Morris whose noteworthy praise of Doug Healy appears to be a well crafted, but less than subtle, endorsement of Mr. Healy to be the next ATAG Commissioner.

5-23-17 ATAG-By Danny Morris

Tuesday, just a few minutes after the noon hour, Commissioner Committee Member, Doug Healy, cancelled the late May ATAG match because it was raining. Mind you, not just a spring shower that might be expected to clear… no, this was a gully washer, a frog strangler, rain event that lasted for a couple of days.

However, mid-afternoon brought a break in the clouds and a temporary end to the two- day downpour. At 3:20 PM, Mr. Healy decided to undo the cancellation and he was able to round up 14 players who each committed to a trip around the outward Ansley nine. Quickly recognizing the ATAG magic was working to create a window of beautiful sunshine, Healy took the type of action that firmly establishes him as a capable, knowledgeable leader. In fact, this is the kind of decision that begins to create the “super nova” aura that surrounded past Commissioner, Don Nichols. Surely Nichols defined the role of Commish by which all once and future ATAG Executives will be judged, fairly or unfairly, against that high bar. Healy, though, has his eyes pointed toward the future and is destined to make his own mark in the heady world of golf group management. This week’s doings prove that.

Draw Partners Instrumental

The last two teams to finish needed draw partners to complete their foursomes. Scotty Greene joined the team of Doug Gooding, Kevin McGlynn and Frank Corrigan. Scotty was able to add a couple of strokes to move that team from -3 to -5. That did not pull them out of the buy zone. They finished last and bought the beer.

Corrigan was also instrumental on another team. Frank was drawn to the team of Brooks Cowles, Danny Morris and Tom Lewis. That team improved, with Corrigan’s help, from six under par to nine under par which made them a winner. As a member of the winning and losing teams Frank bought himself a beer while the other three players collected the sweet ale awarded to the winners.

The sister kissing teams were, respectively, six under and seven under par.

Cowles Is Low Net – Lewis Stuck with the Pink

The winning team had the low net winner and the high net player. Brooks Cowles finished with a net three under 33. While his partner, Tom Lewis, needed 43 net strokes to get around the course.

Low gross was Mike Schmal with 40.

The lone birdie of the afternoon was a three, posted on the par four number 8 hole by Doug Gooding.

ATAG Says Goodbye to the Tennis Porch

With no fanfare whatsoever, the ATAG bunch held its final post golf gathering on the Tennis Porch. The Ansley tennis crowd will no doubt be very glad to see the Men’s Grill open for business. The Grill will open on June 2 and will, by all accounts, be larger and more wonderful than before.

NO ATAG NEXT WEEK

Because of the Memorial Day holiday on Monday, May 29, there will be NO ATAG NEXT TUESDAY, MAY 30. The next ATAG round will be June 6 and the post golf match festivities will occur either in the Grill or upstairs on the ATAG porch.

COMMISSIONER’S COMMENTS:  On a side note, the Commissioner is pleased to announce that two ATAGers are deserving of recognition as well as congratulations for their recent performance on the golf course. First, ATAGer Tim Martin is due kudos for making his first ever hole in one on Settindown’s hole #7 and second, ATAGer Tom Kisgen won the 60 and over flight of last weekend’s two day Fuller Cup Senior Tournament held at both the Ansley and Settindown course. Just goes to show the capabilities of the mid to high handicappers playing on the ATAG Tour who compete every week for the coveted Golden Ale Trophy and perhaps a pocketful of dollar bills to take home for the low net.

Net Scores

Brooks Cowles 33
Kevin McGlynn 34
Craig Sellner 34
Mike Schmal 35
Danny Morris 35
Jeff Colbath 35
Doug Gooding 36
Frank Corrigan 37
Tim Martin 37
Ron Majors 37
Jim Williamson 38
William Thornton 38
Scotty Greene 38
Tom Lewis   43
 
   
   
   
 

 

 
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   

 

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THE WEATHER OUTSIDE IS FRIGHTFUL!


Editor’s Note: The following recap by this week’s reporter Doug Healy was not received until late last night, minutes before press deadline, leaving the editor no choice but to publish the contents as written.

May 16, 2017-By Doug Healy

As much time as has been spent on the weather in this chronicle, I did not think it possible to plow any new ground on that subject, however, as is often the case, I was soon to be proven completely wrong. More on that in a minute.

First the basics. A full field of 20 posted for the event and went off the back a full 5 minutes ahead of our scheduled starting time. Little did we know that we would need all of that time and considerably more, but I digress.

First off was Team 1 consisting of Tim Martin, Tom Kisgen, William Thornton and Anthony Morgan. Ultimately finishing in 2nd place at -9, the highlights of their round included a single birdie by Morgan on #11, a three stroke pick up on #15 courtesy of “two stroking Tom”, and an epic 3 stroke drop on the final 2 holes. Team 2 with Healy, Colbath, Houle and Pearson fired an uninspiring -7 spending most of the evening expecting to host the eventual winners. The group enjoyed pleasant conversation but failed to produce any highlights in their round as even the usually stalwart Lee Pearson came in at 41/35. Team 3; Kohn, Majors, Williamson and Schmal had an equally droll evening but came in at -8, earning them a spot in the no-buy zone. After rocking along at -1/-2 for 5 holes they started a nice progression on 15 but in the end would have needed to play 5 more holes equally well to close the gap. Team 4, our winners at -13, were unmatched. Tom Thornhill recorded 3 birdies earning himself a spot on the ATAG Handicap Watchlist while finishing 36/31 to capture Low Net for the evening.  The names of Wymer, McGlynn and Sellner were also shown on the scorecard.

(Commissioner’s Comment: Tom “Two Glove” Thornhill has been taking money from Ansley Golf Club members for the twenty five years I have known him. To his credit, he cleverly plays to his handicap over the course of a season, making it hard to prosecute as a sandbagger–but he has an uncanny knack to better that handicap when there is money on the line.)

Back to the early starting time and the weather. It was exactly 8:12 pm when Meagher and Gaddis strode into the lounge looking wasted and complaining about the weather which immediately sent the ATAG’ers into, and I kid you not, a spontaneous rendition of the first stanza of Let It Snow. It was no Mormon Tabernacle Choir, but it was certainly “corny” in true ATAG fashion. It was some time later that Jobson and Buist made it to the clubhouse with their DAL -6 scorecard in hand finally allowing the winners their due refreshment. Meagher’s birdie on 15 was their only noteworthy accomplishment.

(Commissioner’s Comment: Pretty easy to read between the lines here about slow play. The match started five minutes early but players in the last group were noted to be arriving some 2 hours 45 minutes or so after the start of their round. Apparently the ATAG “hit when ready” rule is not being enforced)

Not surprisingly, Tom Thornhill earned low gross and low net with his 36/31 and William Thornton shagged the Pink Lady with a net 42. There were 3 birdies by Thornhill and 1 each by Meagher and Morgan. Individual and team scores as follows:

Team 1 (-9) Martin 45/39, Kisgen 47/35, Thornton 49/42 and Morgan 43/33

Team 2 (-7) Healy 47/40, Colbath 48/37, Houle 45/37 and Pearson 41/35

Team 3 (-8) Kohn 42/37, Majors 37/34, Williamson 45/37 and Schmal 41/36

Team 4 (-13) Thornhill 36/31, Wymer 48/37, McGlynn 46/35 and Sellner 49/37

Team 4 (-6) Jobson 48/38, Buist 47/36, Gaddis 45/39 and Meagher 39/37

That’s it for this week. Check out the photos in the Gallery.

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THREE SUBSTITUTE ATAG COMMISSIONERS KIDNAPPED BUT THE MATCH GOES ON!


Editor’s Note:  The above headline and the following preamble to this Tuesday’s ATAG match recap is a fanciful tale envisioned by Doug Healy and was almost edited out completely due to its being, well, how else to say it, “corny”.  (We’ll let the readers decide)Nevertheless, it does demonstrate the enthusiasm of the writer in his attempt to be humorous which he follows with a verbose rambling account of the day’s match, indicating no writer’s cramp in getting his thoughts on paper about what transpired on this particular Tuesday. Mr. Healy also cleverly invited Tom Kisgen to comment on his team’s winning score and embodied those reflections in his match recap.

PREAMBLE: BY DOUG HEALY-5-9-17

In what can only be described as a bizarre twist of golf terrorism, Substitute Commissioners Healy, Morris and Williamson were kidnapped early Tuesday morning by an individual who appeared to be a self-radicalized clown. A proof of life photo (posted in the Gallery) was delivered to Semi-Retired Commissioner Don Nichols with a list of demands that have so far remained confidential. Nichols immediately began negotiations to free the hostages and fearing the worst, quickly moved the 4th Substitute Commissioner, Ron Majors (who had suspiciously cancelled his appearance due to illness), to a secure location.

As you can see from the photo, the hostages were well treated during their captivity, however in a momentary lapse of attention by their clown captor, they were able to escape and make a harrowing, traffic jammed journey from The Golf Club of Georgia to Ansley with only minutes to spare before their 5:36 tee time. None of the three would comment on their ordeal except to say that they were glad to be back inside the Perimeter playing ATAG on a beautiful Tuesday night. The investigation is ongoing.

ATAG MATCH RECAP: 5-9-17-BY DOUG HEALY AND TOM KISGEN

After announcing a full field of 20 for the match, there were three drop outs (including the aforementioned Ron Majors under suspicious circumstances) which narrowed the group to 17 going off the front nine. Given the untimely delays of the Substitute Commissioners, Club Pro Andrew sent the players off in three threesomes and two foursomes which unintentionally created a scoring nightmare with multiple draw partners required to sort things out. The front nine yielded some very compelling scores with two teams @ -11, the ultimate winner @ -16 and two teams who stumbled out of the gate (Thunder Snow??) at -5 and -7. A closer examination of the cards revealed significant benefits accruing to the leading teams from the draw partner process, but some excellent play as well. Tom Kisgen, low new winner @ -3, submitted the following report on his winning team who came in at -16 and included Craig Sellner, Jeff Colbath and draw partner Tom Thornhill.

Tom Kisgen:   “So we had a rather awesome team score last night, once our draw partner came thru on a few critical holes for us (Thank you Tommy 2 gloves). But the bulk of the heavy lifting was shared among our high handicapping threesome. To wit: Craig Sellner got us started with a par “net eagle” on #4. Jeff Colbath topped that with a birdie “net double eagle” on #7! While Kisgen was making a ho-hum par “net eagle” on the same hole, for a team net of 5 under on #7 (has to be a record for one hole in the history of ATAG). And Kisgen closed with a birdie “net eagle” on #9. Lots of lightning bolts striking in our group. But as individuals we finished -1, +1 and -3. Nothing spectacular in our individual 9 hole scoring. Just some good ol ham and egging.” (Note: dedicated readers will recall Mr. Healy’s write up last week where Brooks Cowles lamented the burdens of ham and hamming).

Free beer sponsors for the evening were the team of Healy, Williamson, Morris and Lewis at -5. Tom Lewis, an occasional ATAGer who claims to have had ATAG on his calendar for the last 7 years, picked a rather inauspicious night to mark his return and went down in defeat with his partners who were still a bit unsteady from the day’s events. Other notables included low gross winner Mike Schmal @ 41 (mistakenly announced previously as a tie between Tim Martin and William Thornton at 42) and the Pink Lady awarded to David Danzig.

Individual and Team Results:

Team 1 @ -11: Cowles 44/34, Sawyer 47/36, Schmal 41/36 and Draw Partner Tim Martin 42/35.

Team 2 @ -11: Thornton 42/35, Danzig 54/43, Thornhill 40/35 and Draw Partner Jim Williamson 44/36.

Team 3 @ -16: Sellner 49/37, Colbath 47/35, Kisgen 45/33 and Draw Partner Tom Thornhill 40/35.

Team 4 @ -7: Martin 42/35, Colbath 45/40, Corrigan 50/38 and Wymer 48/38.

Team 5 @ -5: Morris 47/38, Williamson 44/36, Healy 47/40 and Lewis 47/38.

Check out the photos in the Gallery and the updated Leaderboard.

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ONE OF THE BEST ATAG OUTINGS EVER!


NOTE: This week’s recap of the 6th ATAG match of the year is provided by ATAG CFO Doug Healy.

5-2-17 ATAG-By Doug Healy

The 5/2/17 back 9 match was a full grouping of 20 players including Kevin McGlynn’s son Alex, an incoming Ansley member, and a guest of David Danzig (more about him later). The weather which has been a standard topic of this newsletter can be summarized as simply, one of the 5 best ATAG outings ever.

The scores, while mediocre at best, were tightly grouped between -4 and -7 with the exception of Team 5 who stumbled in at +3 to become the hands down sponsors of the evening brew which was enjoyed by Team 3 at -7. A closer look at the journey of Team 5 revealed that after picking up 2 strokes on #1, they gave them back and picked them up again several times before melting down on #18 with a 12 to finish +3. #18 proved challenging for Teams 2 and 3 as well, dropping 2 and 1 strokes respectively which in the end determined the outcome of the match.

Three birdies were recorded 1 each by Mike Schmal #14, Danny Morris #18 and Bill Meagher #13. To Mr. Morris’ credit, his birdie followed a series of 3 doubles and 2 triples demonstrating once again that whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. Low gross was posted by Bill Meagher with a 38 who seemed somewhat relieved that Ron Majors was a no show. The Pink Lady was actually a tie between Jeff Colbath with 56/45 and Danzig’s guest Tim (last name unknown) at 50/45. It was a struggle to come up with a Shot of the Day, however credit should be given to Mike Schmal who chipped to a foot or so from 50 yards on #14 and made the birdie putt.

Low net proved to be a complicated affair with a tie at 35 between Tom Kisgen and Jim Williamson. With everyone relaxing in the temporary accommodations, there was no chance of moving to #18 for a chip off. Alternative formats including naked arm wrestling and pickle ball were dismissed and the Acting Commissioner improvised with a game of chance. Each contestant was challenged to guess the handicap of Mr. Danzig’s guest knowing only that his team finished at +3. The closest without going over was to be deemed the winner. With guesses at 17 and 18, both dramatically exceeded the correct number of 10, and therefore the pot was split. It is useful to point out that Tim shot 50/45, tying for the Pink Lady which is why we singled him out for a little abuse despite the fact that we were delighted to have him as a guest.

It proved to be a perfect evening on the porch with Russ Jobson making a cameo and most players staying around for awhile to enjoy the fun. In a post match interview, this correspondent asked Brooks Cowles what he thought contributed most to his team’s -4 finish, which until Team 5 appeared, looked like the sure loser. As you know the press loves this guy, as he is always ready with a good quote. Tonight was no exception. Without a moment’s thought, he attributed the weak showing to his team’s “ham and hamming it”, a tip of the hat to the typically more successful strategy of ham and egging it.

NOTE: The Commissioner, who continues to monitor ATAG in abstentia, was pleased to learn that one of the young guns from the McGlynn clan is an incoming Ansley member and that he also elected to participate in this week’s match. Will this be the beginning of a youth movement for ATAG—or is ATAG destined to remain a hodge podge of AARP members and/or Medicare beneficiaries?  (just saying.)

Individual and Team Results as follows:

Team 1 @ -4: Cowles, Williamson, Colbath and Buist

Team 2 @ -6: Thornhill, Schmal, Corrigan and Kisgen

Team 3 @ -7: Healy, McGlynn, McGlynn and Thornton

Team 4 @ -5 Martin, Morris, Meagher and Greene

Team 5 @ +3: Danzig, Guest, Gooding and Sellner

Meagher: 38/36                               Cowles: 51/41

Thornhill: 42/37                                 Sellner: 53/41

Schmal: 42/38                                    Colbath: 56/45

Williamson: 43/35

Alex McGlynn: 43/36

Greene: 44/36

Healy: 45/38

Thornton: 45/38

Martin: 46/39

Kisgen: 47/35

Gooding: 47/40

Kevin McGlynn: 48/37

Buist: 49/39

Corrigan: 49/38

Danzig: 50/39

Danzig Guest: 50/45

Morris: 51/42

Check out the photos from this week’s match taken by ATAG photographer Tim Martin.

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4/25 ATAG ROUTINE ON A BEAUTIFUL SPRING EVENING!


Commissioner’s Note: This week’s recap is provided by core ATAGer Ron Majors who last week was on the winning team and duped losing team member Richard Batelaan into buying a mixed drink instead of the customary brewsky. When this was revealed in last week’s issue, Mr. Majors later retorted that it was all “Fake News” reporting. It appears that this week Mr. Majors received his “comeuppance” when he was on the losing team, and winning team member Jim Williamson, apparently acting vicariously for the absent Mr. Batelaan, demanded the more expensive alcoholic beverage alternative. No “fake news” here, but the Commissioner is concerned that a dangerous high stakes precedent is being set that is counter to the ATAG culture.

4/18/17 By Ron Majors

 At precisely 5:00PM the first team teed off on a beautiful spring evening with scoring conditions that attracted a full field of 20 competitors, all anticipating record low scores. If only the actual scores met their expectations.

TEAMS & SCORES

Team #1: (-5) Tim Martin, Craig Sellner, Jeff Colbath, and draftee Steve Barnhart

Team #2: (-4) Sponsors Tom Kisgen, Doug Gooding, Ed McCormack, Ron Majors

Team #3: (-9) Winners Tom Thornhill, John Wymer, Kevin McGlynn, Jim Williamson

Team #4: (-7) Russ Jobson, Mike Schmal, Anthony Morgan, Scotty Greene

Team #5: (-5) Bill Meagher, “Old” Tom Player, David “Double D” Danzig, and draftee Ansley Assistant Pro Tyler Hayes

RECAP: 

The usually friendly front nine was unusually unfriendly on an evening  that provided excellent scoring opportunities. No obvious explanation was voiced by the field other than the usual lament of “I just suck at golf.”  Three Birdies were carded by Tyler Hayes who also carded 3 bogies on his way to a Low Gross score of 36. Commissioner’s Note: Apologies to Tyler Hayes, but even par or better is expected of a professional playing his own course, so, for purposes of the ATAG stats, Bill Meagher’s score of 39 will be recorded as the official ATAG best score and Mr. Hayes score will be duly recorded with a fine print footnote.

Tom Thornhill, Kevin McGlynn, and Ron Majors recorded one birdie each. Low Net (33) winnings were shared by Tom Kisgen and Anthony Morgan.

Many thanks to Acting Commissioner(AC) Jim Williamson who shared this week’s duties with this reporter by getting the tee times and composing the teams. But you may have already observed that AC Williamson, in the continuing tradition of our eerily absent “Commish”, placed the winning team around himself and then had the hutzpah to ask if I would buy him a “vodka & tonic” instead of a beer as his winnings. How ironic after last weeks “fake news.”

There were two dubious nominations for “Shot of the Day.” Russ Jobson’s  shot towards the green on #7 landed in the pond and skipped several times before coming to rest on the left foot bridge – a feat never before recorded in ATAG history. Apparently Russ was unable to play his next shot from that lie and took a drop before marching on to record a 7 for his score. When questioned if he took a penalty stroke for lifting out of the hazard Russ  and his team mates admitted that no penalty stroke was recorded. AC Majors assessed a penalty stroke which resulted in a dance with the “Pink Lady” for the hapless Jobson.

The second nomination was for Ron Majors’ second shot out of the left hand rough under the trees at #4. That shot was a screaming laser that flew the green, landed on the bank behind the green, bounced once into a tree and ricocheted back on to the green before coming to rest 18” from the cup for a tap in birdie. Neither nomination received confirmation from the field.

Note:  No photos were taken of this week’s match.

SCORES

36/36 Tyler Hayes  

39/37 Bill Meagher   (official ATAG best score)

41/35 Tom Thornhill

43/33 Anthony Morgan Low Net Co Winner 

43/36 Tim Martin

43/39 Ron Majors

46/33 Tom Kisgen Low Net Co Winner

 46/41 Mike Schmal

46/38 Jim Williamson

47/40 Doug Gooding

47/39 Scotty Greene

48/36 Craig Sellner

49/37 Kevin McGlynn

49/38 John Wymer

50/39 “Old” Tom Player

50/39 David Danzig

50/42 Steve Barnhart

53/41 Jeff Colbath

55/45 Russ Jobson Pink Lady Winner

57/44 Ed McCormack

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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